I am tired of pain. This thing that’s necessary, inevitable and leaves too many scars. I am tired of being so sensitive to anything that triggers my wounds to bleed.
to the conversations you have
with your soul when you are traveling
those are the most
important conversations you will have
on this earth as you wander the paths of a city
to help you remember
and to help you understand
once you get home of all the things you have already
Tiredness happens when what you love, what you prioritize and what you believe in are in total chaos with each other. To restore your energy is to wander back into your inner world for a day, a week or a month in order for you to attain some balance, mental clarity, and gentle strength to efficiently function as a calm, positive and creative human being once again.
It’s easy to know who I am when I am at peace with my sadness.
And I am starting to learn that when someone says ‘I want to die’ it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re holding a gun to their head, ready to jump from a forty story building or swallow the pills they’re hiding under the bed. ‘I want to die’ could be the same as ‘Look at me. I’m in so much pain. I’m failing my classes on purpose. It has been five days since I last took a shower and my breath smells like too much alcohol.’ ‘I want to die’ could be the very definition of ‘I don’t care about anything anymore, and I need someone to help me’ and of course you’d have to help them because they are tired of life or at the very least—send them to someone you know they can trust.