Inspired by Lang Leav’s “Choose Love”
My mother told me when I was young that there are two types of girls that will love me:
1. The girl who makes me happy but makes me feel unloved.
2. The girl who makes me sad but makes me feel loved.
She told me that on rare occasions I’d find both qualities in one girl. But not every boy is lucky to find both qualities in one girl. So if I ever have to choose between the two, she told me, to always choose the girl who makes me happy because that’s what she always wanted for me.
Yet I don’t want a girl who makes me happy. I want a girl who makes me feel loved. So if I ever have to choose between the two, I will always choose the girl who makes me sad.
More than wounds—I couldn’t take any more scars. You make me feel unloved. And I don’t know why that doesn’t hurt me, yet scars appear out of nowhere. Maybe I’m just sick of loving you. Maybe it’s best to live the lonely life I once lived before I met you. Because there I’m the only one who can scar myself. And no one can stop me from scaring myself. Not even you.