A Fresh Start

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They say that new beginnings are disguised as painful endings. They say that every year is a lesson of love, suffering and everything in between.

I really don’t have the right words to put this year into account. I have been tormented by my own mind for the past 364 days, and it almost led me to killing myself, and I’d like to think that I’m going to a better place next year.

This year, I have learned to put myself first to restore my mental health and see reality as it truly is once again.

This year, I have learned that writing too much, thinking too much could drive any person mad and I guess it’s for the best if I just take it easy next year.

This year I have learned so many things but giving up wasn’t one of them, and I’m proud of myself because I’ve made it, I survived, and I surprised myself a lot.

I am forgiving myself for all the regrets that I have this year and not allowing fear to control me next year because I have learned that not everything I feel is real.

If only I can bloom all year long I will bloom all year long but the truth is that’s not possible, and sometimes I should wilt before I rise. Rock bottom was the place I found myself this year, and I discovered that I’m both terrifying and lovely. I still have a long way to go on my inner journey towards loving myself. I still have a long way to go to become who I am and achieve excellence. Greatness, after all, does not happen overnight.

January 1, 2018, falls on a Monday. A fresh day, a fresh week, a fresh month, a fresh year and a fresh start. I couldn’t think of any better time to change and becoming a better version of myself.