I understand actually, what it’s like to feel like the only way to understand the pain is to self-destruct. Real family or friends aren’t there all the time for me and most of the time loneliness consumes me when they’re nowhere to be found. That’s why there’s cigarettes, drugs, and alcohol because sometimes I don’t have that option that others have which is to reach out. But when I finally have the chance to talk to someone I don’t. I have a problem with trusting people, and I love sleeping pills too much.